As a social writer, I engage people. If they’re funny, I re-Tweet them. If they’re insightful, I like their posts. I share. I vlog. In return, I often receive glowing posts from Mom.

This online activity earns a Klout score. Mine is 46. While 46 may be failure on a math test, it’s 26 points less than the King of All Media and 26 points more than Tweets-to-himself.

In its assessment, Klout catches me off guard: “You influence [your mother].” At first, a little embarrassed, I wonder if anyone else can see this. They can/not. Mom digs my writing. The Web is her fridge door. But why is it such a big deal?

MyParentsJoinedFacebook.com shows how awkward it can get. My mom was an entrepreneur. Yes, her feedback is valuable. Except, perhaps, replies to social networking ranking.

“I’ve always believed in you,” she writes in her follow-up comment. “You can do anything you set your mind to do. If clout is what you need, then go out and get some.”

How do you feel about the folks in your network?

I witness a horrific thing. At the corner of Hamilton and Nelson in Vancouver, a woman ignores the orange hand and crosses Hamilton to meet the grill of a car forced to complete a right turn. She falls, jumps up and stumbles away. The driver looks distracted by his low Klout score.

This happens often, I’m sure, especially when both rushed texting pedestrian and right-on-red head nodding driver aren’t with it. What disturbs me—beyond the fact that walker and driver don’t have it out—is that no one around me reacts. I watch thumbs text and cars whisk by me.

I study the irresponsive driver and his white car with purple windows as they quickly dash around the corner. He glances back at the pedestrian, who now re-Tweets with a limp.

What’s wrong with us? We can thwart government oppression around the globe via social networking with hashtags. We like kittens and share laughing babies among friends. But something’s wrong out here. Undoubtedly, we forget how to live in the moment.

As we go on about getting engaged online and ensuring sustainable relevancy in rapidly crowding marketplaces, I fear we lose touch with our innate ability to care for what’s in front of us. Let us raise our heads and lower our ridiculously large shades. What do we feel?

Get in touch with that, and maybe it’ll be easier to relate online and react on the street.

Mobile marketing is on the rise. Copywriters, editors and search engine experts must learn to adapt. I’ve discovered and used three key elements to produce effective mobile content.

1. Mobile writing must relate. I help mobile marketing agencies, advertising campaigns and interactive teams understand and value the importance of content in context. This has always been the case, of course, but now it is more critical that I connect interface design or mobile app development with short, precise copy that speaks solely to the targeted smartphone user.

Young & Rubicam’s copy man, George Gribbin, drives this point home: “A copywriter should have an understanding of people, an insight into them, a sympathy toward them.”

2. After I find out what’s important to the people I engage, I discover how they use their smartphones to access mobile apps, location-based marketing or multimedia messages. This can be determined through account planning or by regularly communicating with interface designers. I use this to write mobile copy that targets the most predictable actions.

“Obsess over customers: when given the choice between obsessing over competitors or customers, always obsess over customers.”  –Jeff Bezos, CEO, Amazon.com

3. As I drill down to small words and short phrases—even smaller and shorter than what I use for website writing—I follow a mobile search strategy that specifically target queries made from handheld devices. Why? What we text with our thumbs is often less verbose than what we type with our keyboards. I research top mobile-only keyword search queries accordingly.

To recap, mobile writing is relevant to consumers, mindful of their preferences and reflective of mobile searches. AT&T expects mobile marketing spend to increase in 2012. Are you ready?

I work with an interactive team that plans for more mobile marketing in 2012. We’re stoked.

Headlines and heels can be sexy. They can be pointed or rounded. They can spark conversation or alienate the wrong audience. If your story has legs—or if your legs have a story—the headline one writes or heels one wears must lead the eye to it.

Did this headline grab you? Then here are three things headlines and heels share…

1. Headlines and stilettos make anyone appear taller. Ask any business exec, drag queen or web maven, and s/he’ll tell you, especially if s/he’s drunk at a Vancouver meetup: “They help me tower over my self-esteem issues…or poorly written LinkedIn bio.”
2. High heels and headlines both pop in red. Christian Louboutin, Santa Claus and even Yves Saint Laurent feel they’re the sole proprietors of red. Direct response writers employ red every time they want to wake us up. The Sun (UK) sports a red masthead.
3. No matter how much headlines or high heels may hurt, they work. The Independent (UK) once headlined with: “Africans are less intelligent than Westerners, says DNA pioneer.” J. Edgar Hoover likely had a lot of blisters, but I’ll bet he didn’t mind at all.

Beyond these characteristics, headlines and heels also serve a common purpose.

These attention-getting things must make a statement that compels their respective audience—either readers or fetishists—to continue, whether that’s up the legs to find beautiful haute couture or down the lines of a beautifully written story.

Do your headlines turn heads? If not, fire your writer.

I open a web application form, which contains fields for input, not a model for software. Fields? Kate Moss? I know, right? The form’s creators embrace cultural diversity. They critically examine social exclusion, but this text appears at the First Name field: “Please, no foreign characters.”

It takes one long second before I get it: Please use English only. I’m blonde, OK? But still…

The key to eradicating ambiguity is to pair precise copy with foolproof setting. An open-door policy provides just enough shtick for Bob’s fun-filled locksmithing biz, but it might suck out the pilot of the space station or rudely interrupt the marriage counsellor in a one-on-one session.

If you don’t match content with context, you may have a PPC ad, a blog post or a web page that reads ridiculously funny to some and awfully confusing to the rest of us.

• I posted more pictures of my adorable toddler to Facebook in the hopes of finally convincing the few high school friends I had that I’m still, indeed, a really awesome guy.
• Google Analytics and Webmaster Tools now track the impact of social media activities. Mashable’s Ben Parr strings together keywords on Google Analytics Social Plugin.
• @KupofExcellence Tweets something in French about “Facebook,” “cafés” and “photos.” 694 Anglo followers stick around to celebrate Canadian coffee culture, anyways.
• As Vancouver takes to social media to identify Stanley Cup rioters, one UBC undergraduate student goes on about “a culture of mass surveillance” in her 827-word essay.
• Both @Steaz and @WhitefishGroup still politely ask us to drink “the best tasting organic and fair trade beverages on the planet.” It’s hot outside, so please drink it…
• MySpace.com has been sold to an ad network for a mere $35 million. Justin Timberlake will manage its creative direction. WSJ.com writer Tom Loftus carries on about it.
• It’s my mother’s birthday. While she forgot both her laptop and her iPad, 13 Facebook friends (and counting) have already posted best wishes on her sunny day. Go Mom!
• Google+ pre-launch invites were halted after just a few hours, but that didn’t stop Alfredo Perez from giving the new social networking platform the finger in his video debut.

Want to celebrate? Find a Mashable Meetup near you.

Huh? Email list knowledge is what you know about your list of email subscribers. Email list segmentation divvies up that list to reach specific subscribers with targeted content. How?

While you can’t always grab more than a name and an email address, it’s possible to position pre-signup content in a way that speaks to one specific target market: women losing weight vs. men losing weight. How? Before you think about list building or email marketing campaigning, consider your audience. Who are they? Name them. Get to know them. Then list how each person may differ. Divide your targets, then reach out. How will you do this before you email?

The best strategy for successful emailing doesn’t start with emailing, it begins with marketing funnels that bring these names and email addresses to your inbox. Think of segmentation in your PPC campaign. Consider a specific target market with each micro-website you develop. One Google ad targets health-conscious women. Another landing page appeals to self-conscious men. Then, you can send better emails that are more likely to be opened, read and acted on.

“Carey, this isn’t just blog filler, is it?” No. I’m no Robert Burko, but I can assure you this is an excellent email tip. Consider MailChimp’s research on email list segmentation. Neat, huh?

While I’m clearly not about to live it up in a “two-piece bikini,” as a stocky male writer, I suggest revising “two-piece bikini” as “two-piece swimsuit” or “bikini.” I can’t help it. It’s what I do.

Your SEO specialist updates website content to stay on page one of Google’s keyword search, but the SEM guy’s bright idea sends that result to the back of the query. Your SEM specialist changes PPC campaign just as your SEO specialist changes highly targeted website content. Their good intentions cancel each other out. How are you going to make both work for you?

Grab a latte with both SEO specialist and SEM specialist. Buy them each their favourite java. Plus banana bread (this is key). Somewhere between “I didn’t do it.” and “Say ‘Hello’ to your wife,” suggest they work together on your SEO and SEM marketing goals. Web page optimization. PPC campaign tweaking. Both in harmony can lead to results, revenue and brand value.

If your specialists spit out their double tall vanilla soy lattes or prefer Green Lantern over your coffee klatch, hire a new search marketing team. Today’s search marketers value SEO and SEM integration. They’ll make sure your keywords fit both internal web pages and external ads. If they don’t, there’s a better solution for you. Ahem. Rhymes with “Carey Says Ums.”

Read Matt Lawson’s tips on how to streamline SEO and SEM integration. Then, let’s talk.

Your SEO specialist updates your website content to stay on page one of Google keyword search, but Google updates its algorithms to send you to the back of the query. Your SEM specialist changes your PPC campaign, but your PPC campaign no longer jives with on-site content. That tailspins conversions. How the heck are you going to keep both working for you?

Grab a coffee. Invite both your SEO specialist and your SEM specialist. Buy them each their favourite drink and, perhaps, some banana bread. Somewhere between “I didn’t do it.” and “Say ‘Hello’ to your wife,” suggest they work together on your SEO and SEM marketing goals. Web page optimization. PPC campaign tweaking. Both can lead to results, revenue and brand value.

If you’re SEO and SEM specialists spit out their tall lattes or hint they prefer rock-paper-scissors over your ideas, consider a new team. Today’s online marketers know the critical links between SEO and SEM. They’ll make sure your keywords fit both internal web pages and external ads. If they don’t, there’s a better solution for you. Ahem. Rhymes with “Carey Says Ums.”

Mashable.com’s Matt Lawson shares tips on how to streamline SEO and SEM integration.

Why do I want to share this event with you? Interlink Conference 2011 reflects the teamwork it takes to produce the web we want to see. It isn’t just a web conference for designers and developers. Font designers mingle with web browser developers. Usability specialists talk shop with website architects and digital strategists. Website writers and WordPress theme creators learn together in this unique three-day event, scheduled June 2-4 in North Vancouver, Canada.

With every digital comm. project I take on, I realize it takes the right team—coupled with the right client input—to yield results, revenue and brand value. This web conference celebrates collaboration and the infusion of many influencers to design and develop the best products and services for our clientele (and their customers). I hope that participants will appreciate and embrace the collective approach needed to succeed in today’s evolving web marketplace.

If you’re in Vancouver, I hope to see you there. If not, you can still follow the excitement at InterlinkConference.com. Plus check out our creative collaboration for the Mail Chimp-sponsored doge ball event:  Tournament of Chimpions.